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As an avid Redditor, I often find myself stumbling across international oddities and what other nations consider “must haves.” Irn Bru, without a doubt, is touted as a miracle elixir that us Yankees can never hope to match (despite our entry of Cherry Coke as the best beverage on the planet*). Billed as Scotland’s “other” national drink, Irn Bru is a carbonated beverage that I was finally able to find on Amazon (it sort of comes and goes in stock). Excitedly, I checked out and promptly forgot about my bubbly goodness until it arrived on my doorstep already frosted to perfection thanks to the Great Arctic Vortex of 2014.
Granted, the image on Amazon should have prepared me, but I wasn’t expecting Irn Bru to be so….orange. Apparently, back in 1901 when they first concocted this beast, they added 0.002% of iron leading to its namesake, Iron Brew aka Irn Bru and, I presume, it’s color. According to Barr’s website, Irn Bru is best drank out of glass. Who am I to disagree? I eagerly twisted the cap, anticipating a fountain of foam from Mr Bru’s long journey, but was shocked as a simple sigh of CO2 escaped it’s plastic prison. I double-checked the “Best By” date and then re-checked once more since those damn Europeans do everything backasswards. June 2014. Seems as though everything was in order.
I’m dragging out the suspense here. I know what you want to know. How did it taste? Well, that’s a damn good question. One that, after two bottles, I’m still trying to figure out how to aptly answer. For one thing, it definitely lacks the “savory” (for lack of a better word) taste of American sodas. I’ve noticed this in other foreign beverages, such as Manzanita and Colombiana, as well. Secondly, the sugar part of it tastes like artificial sweetener to me. Of course, this is coming from a man who can’t stomach Pepsi’s throwbacks that include real cane sugar, so take that as you will.
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Hey everyone! It’s been quite a while since I’ve written anything in this blog. I needed to update the look as well. I hope to update quite regularly from here on out. While I may have an off-the-wall post now and then, I plan to focus on food and beer. Hopefully, I’ll be able to focus primarily on Ohio food and beer, but we’ll just see if I can keep up with updating in general!
53. Factory 81 – Peace Officer
54. Scars on Broadway – They Say
55. Simon Sayz – Hey You
56. Sinisstar – Freak Of Nature
57. Sloth – Dead Generation
58. Sparta – Taking Back Control
59. Sprottenrock – Couchparty (German)
60. Stereomud – Sunlight
61. Strata – Piece By Piece
62. Superheist – Pulse
Download Vol. 5 here.
I can’t really tell you how exactly I ended up reading a book about the most famous man in porno. I was browsing around for some ebooks on FDR for my Kindle when I found this in someone’s “Must Read Biographies” list. I was intrigued as I’ve never really read anything about the porn industry before. The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz follows the legendary Ron Jeremy and his 9 3/4″ “Equipment.”
Having done more than 1,800 adult films and slept with more than 4,000 women, I expected the book to be full of torrid stories of debauchery and excess. Given Jeremy’s penchant for comedy, I also expected to laugh my ass off.
The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz starts out normal enough. Ron Jeremy Hyatt lays bare his life beginning with his teenage years in New York. He enraptures the reader with tales of timid sexual exploration and the glory days of the ’70s “free love” movement. Halfway through the book, I was caught up in Jeremy’s story. In addition to the roundabout manner in which he ended up in porn, the “Hedgehog” details his endless desire to be a standup comedian and to break into showbiz. The adventure had, so far, managed to keep my interest.
At this point, a photo montage broke up the middle of the book. Featuring over 20 pictures, Jeremy wanted to showcase practically every famous person he has ever met. While I understand the reasoning for this, as I possess a narcissistic streak as well, the remaining 175 pages read more like a Wikipedia article: “I did this movie. I had a role in that movie. I was cut from this movie. I met this person. I introduced these two celebrities. I opened for this band.” I am fine with someone laying out their accomplishments, but each lacked substance. When Jeremy announced Limp Bizkit, there was no amusing story about backstage antics…simply a paragraph about him doing it before moving on to another paragraph referencing how he used to hang out with Slash, followed by yet another paragraph mentioning how much Jim Carrey and Robin Williams liked him.
I will admit that the second half of the book was painful to finish. I found myself resisting the urge to skip ahead and gloss over the ridiculous amount of self-aggrandizement. Ron Jeremy claims that he likes to poke fun at himself and enjoys being an “average man” just like the rest of us. However, The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz reads more like a treatise to all those that doubted him or snubbed him in his life. Or perhaps it is just Jeremy’s way of achieving that Tom Cruise-esque celebrity status that he always pined for.
Despite its misgivings, I did enjoy the occasional nugget of Jeremy’s life. I found myself rooting for him to make his standup comedy act into something the whole world would enjoy. He seems like an honestly genuine guy that made it 90% of the way but couldn’t find the right combination of porno stardom and natural talent to complete the journey.
43. Ours – Sometimes
44. Darwin’s Waiting Room – Feel So Stupid
45. Pressure 4-5 – Melt Me Down
46. Double Drive – 1000 Yard Stare
47. Project 86 – The Spy Hunter
48. Dracma – Blanco Y Azul (Spanish)
49. Ra – I Believe
50. Dredg – Symbol Song
51. Reach 454 – New Scar
52. Revelation Theory – After the Rain
Download Vol. 4 here:
Another round of BYSK!
33. Memento – Nothing Sacred
34. Boy Hits Car – I’m A Cloud
35. Nevada Tan – Niemand Hoert Dich
36. Boysetsfire – High Wire Escape Artist
37. No One – Chemical
38. Breaking Point – Brother
39. One Minute Silence – Holy Man
40. Crossbreed – Machines
41. Oomph – Augen Auf
42. Dangerous New Machine – Burn
Download Vol. 3 here.
Vol. 2 and Vol. 1 are also still available.